Second Hit | Audio + Action for Route 35

[impheired]

Audio:
[If you thought Kuzuryuu would be happy about the prospect of a fancy red carpet event, then you are sorely mistaken. Though, at the moment, this might have more to do with the uh...method of invitation Clair decided to employ than the event itself. Three guesses who got beaned right in the head with a few of those ping pong balls. First two guesses don't count.]

[It was Kuzuryuu.]

Why the everloving fuck would you decide to invite people to something by dropping goddamn plastic balls on them!? That's not fucking normal, who the hell does something like this!? This better not be something that happens regularly here, I swear...

[He trails off, falling into a sort of contemplative silence for a few moments.]

What the hell is a prom, anyway? Some kind of party or something? [Hello, I am very Japanese and we do not have proms. Also I went to murderschool. There are no dances at murder school, only murders.] VIPs I get but wh-- son of a bitch!! [The sounds of a jostled struggle can be heard, along with a range of very happy Ariados noises.]

Goddammit, Meiwaku!! You can't fucking-- [What is even going on over there...] Get off you dumbass!! I swear to fu-- [Thankfully, the transmission cuts out fairly quickly into the unseen scuffle. He'll uh...he'll get back to you if anybody actually wants to answer that question about prom.]

Action:
[For anybody who happens to be out and about, they might run into Kuzuryuu mid-spider scuffle just outside of Goldenrod on Route 35. He's been out here training for most of the day (as per usual) and has two new evolutions to show for it: Bisharp and Ariados. The former appears as calm as she ever does, cradling Kuzuryuu's Pokégear in her hands and watching the scene before her with something that might be amusement. As for the latter...apparently she either hasn't noticed or doesn't care that evolving means she's quite a bit bigger than she used to be. So she's very determinedly trying to climb all over her master just like in the (not so) good ol' days. It's not really working but that isn't stopping her. Nothing is stopping her.]

[She WILL reclaim her fuzzy throne, rules of physics and everything that is logical be damned!!]

[Needless to say, Kuzuryuu is not amused and there's quite a bit of yelling going on and even more swearing.]

You're too big for that now, dipshit!! Fucking-- QUIT!! I didn't even-- DAMMIT! How about I fucking sit on you for a change, huh!? Then what, fucker!?

[He wasn't kidding about that because after a few more moment's wrestling, he definitely plants himself squarely on her back. Though...since he hardly weighs more than she does, the impact is probably not as impressive as he was hoping for. It surprised her enough to pin her to the ground, sure, but she barely seems to mind if the even happier noises and excited squirming are anything to go by.]

[Approac-- more like turn around and walk away and pretend you didn't see this. Why would you...]

Comments

video;

[lullabytes]

I got told it's a dance. So, we're going, right? We all should absolutely go.

[ WE'RE GOING, RIGHT. RIGHT. KUZURYUU-KUN THE ANSWER IS YES, RIGHT. ]

video;

[impheired]

[DAMMIT NANAMI HOW DID YOU KNOW HIS ANSWER WAS GOING TO BE NO.]

That's what I'm hearing too...

[Kuzuryuu that doesn't answer the question and it isn't even an artful dodge. That's just plan not answering it.]

[action]

[konpeitoqueen]

[...What.

What.]

...Are you serious? [No, really. She doesn't know whether to find this funny or really fucking pathetic.] SHSL Yakuza, letting their own Pokémon embarrass them in public...? Pah! That's hilarious!

[Okay, maybe she does.]

[action]

[impheired]

[Oh. It's you. Can you tell how ecstatic Kuzuryuu is to see you, Saionji? How utterly enthused??]

Oi, Saionji...so did you find your Lilligant yet?

[You wanna talk about an embarrassment? Alright, we'll talk about a real embarrassment.]

[soundmind]

...[She'll give him a moment.]

It's a big party that involves dancing if you're into that sort of thing.

[Just a moment isn't enough, is it.]

[impheired]

[Yeah it's going to be a couple minutes before the oh-so soothing sound of Kuzuryuu's voice comes back.]

[...okay more than a couple. He'll get back to her though...not that he'll have much to say, apparently.]

Ugh, no. Definitely not. [PARTIES, EW. Too bad he's getting dragged there, anyway.]

[nostabbing]

She did that last year, too.

[HI KUZURYUU HI LOOK WHO IT IS.]

I guess prom is kind of like a high school dance or whatever. People dance. They don't democratically elect royalty at this one, though. At least they didn't last year. But there's dancing and a pool and you sleep in garages in sleeping bags and people sneak off to have sex and there's lots of really good food.

[Thanks, Parker.]

[impheired]

[WHO DA FUQ IS YOU?]

[More importantly, where the fuq does he even start with...everything you just said. He's not sure what to address first here: the fact these invites are a repeat performance, the concept of high school dances, democratically elected royalty, or the idea of high schoolers doing the do.]

S...Sneak off to... What the fuck!? Didn't you say this is an event for high school kids!? [He seems to have misunderstood the part where they just borrowed the name and there will be more than just high schoolers there... Adults can have sex, that's fine. It's just high schoolers that are the problem you kids are too young for that shit.]

[Thanks, Parker, indeed. You have firmly cemented in his mind just how much he does not want to go to this thing.]

[Voice]

[moveslikestrider]

[Dave manages not to laugh (out loud), but inside he's laughing. All the laughter forever. He'd missed hearing someone be loud and angry with a lot of swearwords. It's like a song that brings him in to mock them.]

Going to assume this is one of those culture clashes like Denny's being ritzy to some people but to Americans it's like...

Anyway the person throwing it last year was Gym Leader Claire the dragon lady. Really dramatic woman or maybe that's just big time people in general.

Prom is a big party held at the Elite Four Headquarters. It's technically a USA tradition for high schoolers in their junior and senior years before we get punted into society. This world does a lot of things ass backwards and combines other stuff but yeah, it's a party in a location we normally can't get to.

[Voice]

[impheired]

[As expected, there's a noticeable delay before Kuzuryuu gets back to answering. Fucking spiders, man.]

...what's Denny's like in America?

[Bingo, Dave. You got it. This is exactly the same kind of culture clash because Kuzuryuu is from the exact same country as Kirigiri.]

This all sounds like a pretty lame tradition. Even lamer than the school trips we did back home. [They weren't that bad, Kuzuryuu. Don't lie.] But I'm guessing here it has nothing to do with school, yeah? Since there doesn't even seem to be schools in this place for whatever reason.

[Action]

[tallandproud]

[Hinata had been looking for Kuzuryuu to see if he wanted to grab lunch together, and came across the oddest sight he's ever seen. ...if he brings up how Kuzuryuu fits perfectly on the back of a spider he's going to be a dead man.

Really, really dead.]

Kuzuryuu?!

[Monomi bounces over to inspect the situation and sighs like everyone involved with it is an idiot. Hinata motions for his Growlithe and Luxray to follow him as he comes over to get a better look.]

What [the hell] are you doing? Besides having an argument. [And losing.]

[Action]

[impheired]

[Super high school level dead, boy. That's what you'll be.]

[...even if it's really, really true. He is the perfect size to sit on his arachnophobe's-worst-nightmare-sized spider.]

The fuck does it look like I'm doing? I'm giving her a taste of her own fucking medicine now that she's big enough for me to manage it!

['scuze you, though, who is the one who is literally on top here? Clearly he's not losing. Ding dong, you've got that wrong. Kuzuryuu is the victor.]

Audio;

[tentacletrainer]

Traditionally Prom is a high school dance. It's more like a large, formal social event here in Pokemon land. There's still dancing and mingling, but there's a lot more to do at Tohjo Falls than there would be at the school event.

Audio;

[impheired]

[Give him a bit, Rose. He's gotta take care of this stupid fucking Ariados before he gets back to you.]

Tohjo Falls? ...so what else is there to do then?

[You had him at "things besides dancing and mingling."]

audio

[imthe_shit]

Yeah... I hear you on that. Didn't expect it to start raining balls while I was helping my friend practice battling.

At least they weren't bigger or harder than plastic...

audio

[impheired]

Who expects that sort of thing!? Even if it apparently happened last year! Hell, that almost makes it worse...

[HOW DID NOBODY LIKE...COMPLAIN ABOUT THIS?? OR ANYTHING???]

They really couldn't think of a better way to invite people to this thing than dropping something on them??

[video]

[apego]

[Someone sure sounds awfully mad.]

I think it's like a party, yes? I never heard of anything like it before but it should be fun! Are you thinking about going?

[video]

[impheired]

[He is definitely mad. Your average wild Kuzuryuu spends at least a good 70% of its day mad. Sometimes more. By the time he finally gets his spider problem under control and can get back to his gear, he at least doesn't LOOK as mad as he sounded.]

[...But he still kinda looks mad because that's just how he is. One day his face is going to get stuck like that.]

No.

[Wow there was absolutely no hesitation there and could he possibly have said it any more flatly? No. Probably not.]

...But I get the feeling it's not going to matter what I'm thinking. My classmates are probably going to try and drag me along anyway.

action;

[superordinary]

[ Today's a good day for training his Pokémon, so Naegi decides to head to Route 35 since that's where his usual level grinding spot is. His trusty Arcanine is at his side, ready to start OHKOing everything as soon as Naegi tells him to.

...But then they arrive just in time to witness Kuzuryuu yell and swear at his giant spider and that certainly isn't something they can ignore and walk away from. ]

What's going on here?

[ ...He's going to regret asking this, isn't he. ]

action;

[impheired]

[Yes. Absolutely. You should have walked away while you had the chance, Naegi.]

Discipline, what's it look like?

[Kuzuryuu, no. It's really not. It would be if your Ariados actually minded this. Which she very clearly doesn't.]

video;

[angerpoints]

[... okay, Yusuke has no idea what exactly just happened on the other end of the line there, but whatever it was, it sounded funny. THEREFORE, when the video feed clicks open on Yusuke's end, Yusuke will be sitting there smirking and generally looking amused as hell at Kuzuryuu's expense. At least he's elected not to make any smartassed remarks (for now, anyway).]

Yeah, it's a party. They had one last year, too. It's dull as hell if you're not into dancing or fancy rich people parties, but the good news is that someone'll probably smuggle in some booze and spike the punch so we won't all have to be sober throughout the whole thing.

[Aw yes, free alcohol. Who says Yusuke isn't an optimist?]

video;

[impheired]

[Whatever exactly it was that just happened, all evidence of it is gone by the (quite delayed) time Kuzuryuu turns on the feed. Spider, what spider? She's in her ball now, there's no problem here.]

The fuck, you're underage, aren't you!? That's not something to look forward to, dumbass!!

[This is it. This is the SHSL Gangster. Fuyuhiko "Underage Drinking is Bad" Kuzuryuu.]

[Making a mental note now not to go anywhere near punch bowls because his tolerance is absolute shit and, by his own words, just smelling it is enough to get him tipsy. Is he exaggerating? We just don't know.]

[You may have kept the smartass comments to yourself, Yusuke, but apparently you still set him off. Good job. Not that...that takes a whole lot of skill or effort, really.]

video;

[voidedrogue]

It's a fancy party! Or so I hear. You should be excited, fancy parties are hella rad.

[ SAYS THE GIRL WHO'S NEVER BEEN TO A BIG FANCY PARTY but details ]

video;

[impheired]

[DOES THIS FACE LOOK EXCITED TO YOU, ROXY?]

Well I'm not. The fact that the hostess couldn't even hand out invitations like a normal fucking person only makes me even less so.

Action;

[puppetnurse]

[It was hard to decide if she should approach at first, because that spider was not making him very happy. But when he sat on her and made a big deal out of it, as if it were going to upset Meiwaku, well...]

I...don't think that's working, Kuzuryuu-san...I'm pretty sure she's enjoying that.

[She's just saying what everyone else is thinking.]

Action;

[impheired]

[Mei clicks her pincers at Tsumiki, flailing her legs. TSUMIKI. TSUMIKI. TSUMIKI HI. HI TSUMIKI HI!! OωO]

You got any fucking better ideas!? At least this way she's not trying to crawl all over me!

[Tsumiki that was not the best thing you could have said right now...couldn't you tell he was already in one of his moods?]