impheired | Private Channel

[Fuyuhiko's eye widens a little in surprise.]

...only four, really?

[He pretty much expected her to all but skip through the streets, flinging sweets at everybody she came across. Especially If she made him one?? He did not realize he was quite so special.]

I wanted to make more, but I didn't have the supplies. Or the money to get more supplies...

[And this is actually pretty disappointing, judging by the way she's pouting.]

If I could make one for everyone I would have...I'm going to have to stockpile for next year.

Ah.

[What the hell though, WHY NOT ASK THE GRUNKLES FOR MORE MOOLAH?]

Well I'm...flattered to be included in that four, in that case. [Okay, well more like stunned mostly but...flattered too, yes. The concept of people outside of his family (both blood and otherwise) is still kind of a strange one, but...feels good, man. Feels good.]

[She doesn't really know how much moolah they have! She's pretty used to Stan being kinda stingy, okay. He's a great guy but he does not like parting with his money. Besides she thinks he works in like...body...parts...? So who knows how much of his money is actually money..........]

You're welcome! And there, all better. For the most part. There's still some glitter there, but at least it's not all glitter and all floof now.

Thanks.

[He's just...gonna shake a much of the excess glitter off this card as he can before gently rolling it up to stick it in his pants pocket.]

So...what exactly did you want to do? Or was that it?

[Just give him the card and go? Or are they hanging out. He's not sure what to do.]

That's all I really had planned, but I'm always up to hanging out more! Maybe we could go play some games at the arcade, or take a walk? Oh! But either way, I really need your address. I wanna hang out at your house some time! I could bring over some board games and snacks!

Oh uh...I don't really...have an address. [He scratches at the back of his head.] My classmates and I live in a castle a little ways northwest of here. Up by Lake Dala.

[Her hands are instantly over her mouth as she gasps, eyes lighting up immediately.]

A castle?!

[Nothing else matters. He lives in a castle this is the most important thing.]

You live in a castle? That's so cool! You have to show me sometime, I want to see your castle!

Mm, yeah. Bought it from Tikbalang a couple months back. It's a Japanese castle though, so it's nothing like what you're probably thinking.

[Cliche and boring European castles!!]

But sure, I can show you sometime.

Oh my gosh, that's even better! I've seen Japanese castles before, in books and stuff, but I've never been to one. They're so pretty!

[She bounces on her toes a little, though the action is too awkward to maintain for long with double ankles and she kind of...ends up stumbling and falling over with a squeak.

Those long arms are useless when they're just kind of flailing a little, trying to figure out how to catch herself...she'll be okay if she hits the ground but if you can catch her Fuyuhiko that'd be cool too. Either way, there's a soft "owwwww" from the little girl.]

[Unfortunately, he doesn't manage to catch her because he's not nearly shoujo manga enough for that kind of move. He does, however, try and help her get back up on her feet.]

You alright? Maybe we oughta get you back to your house...really, I'm surprised you walked this far on legs like these.

Mmmaybe... [She takes the assistance, keeping her weight off her left foot for the moment.]

They're kind of hard to walk around on, but I have to try if I want to see any of my friends...you're all worth it.

Nggk--!!

[RIGHT THROUGH THE HEART. FRIENDS????]

[What is with all these people just throwing that word around so casually??]

W-well, it's not like people can't come and see you, right? I mean...I think most people would understand how hard it'll be on you till your legs finish...whatever it is they're doing. [WHY ARE YOUR CHANGES SO WEIRD, MABEL.] Personally, I'd rather you not break your legs and fuck 'em up, so...

[FRIENDS.]

Well...I mean I guess.

[But at the same time there's so much to see and do in Bavan? She loves her family and loves the peninsula version of the Shack, but they have so many cool things in the city. It's a city, not a dinky (but charming) little town like Gravity Falls!]

I wish they'd just finish already. They're cool with how weird they are, but they're getting awfully annoying!

[NOOOOOOO.]

Careful not to jinx yourself, you keep bitching like that and you could end up waiting a while. But, hopefully they'll fix themselves before this fog ends.

[Though why she considers wonky feet like that "cool" is beyond him.]

Anyway, if you haven't got any other plans, how about I take you back to your house?

[ACCEPT YOUR FATE.]

I always have great luck. I'm sure it'll all work out! [Always. The universe loves her basically? But then how could it not, she is Mabel Pines.]

Okay! We can do that. I can introduce you to everyone then! If they're home...Grunkle Stan is probably home.

That's...not the one I talked to on the network, right?

[Who the hell names their kids Stanford and Stanley, like for real here.]

[He bends down a little, facing away from Mabel and clearly wanting her to hop up on his back.]

C'mon, I'll carry you back.

[Stay off those dumb feet! You've already had one accident today.]

Right! That one's Grunkle Ford.

[She doesn't say anything about the offer, moving to carefully hop up like she's being asked. She is never one to turn down a piggy back ride!]

Grunkle Ford is all smart and nerdy and science-y. He's the one who wants to learn more about all the monsters and keep a journal about them. Grunkle Stan is the one that wants to sell you stuff, or buy your claws and fur and stuff. And also post lots of jokes.

[He was the one posting all those tasteless one-liners a while back that Mabel definitely participated in...]

[Thank god Mabel is tiny and also that he actually IS a little stronger in his wereform. He can actually make it all the way to the shack this way.]

I see. You're gonna have to tell me where I'm going, by the way. I have no idea where this shack of yours is.

[But he's going to head towards the park entrance all the same, because that seems like the most logical place to start.

Oh, I can do that real easy!

[And she'll give him a couple directions to follow once he reaches the park entrance. Very easy "turn this way, turn that way."]

But yeah. You'll get used to 'em. If Grunkle Stan posted more to the network you'd probably be able to tell them apart real easy. He's a lot more like me, I guess, or I'm like him. But compared to Grunkle Ford it's like...night and day! Grunkle Ford uses all this proper speak and big words and likes to make himself sound really smart, which I guess he is since he has something like 12 college degrees I think? He definitely sounds like he does.

And Grunkle Stan is a lot more casual and kind of rough speaking. More like an old man than Grunkle Ford. He's really funny though, when he's not telling his uncle jokes, and really nice, and I think that comes through a lot when he's not just trying to talk you into buying something.

[Yup!]

Don't let him talk you into buying something. Don't tell him I told you this, but like...I don't know where he gets all his stuff from and it might not be entirely legal I don't think? And I have no idea how the laws here work...I know he can probably get around them just fine but like what happens if you're caught with stolen antlers that he sold you? As my friend I have to look out for your well being when my Grunkles are involved!

[Ty, Mabel, he will surely find it with your straightforward guidance!]

Heh, your Grunkle Stan sounds more like my kinda guy. Though you won't have to look out for me around him, I assure you. I'm not so easily conned. But even if I was, I wouldn't be the Super High School Level Yakuza if I got arrested for something as lame as getting caught with stolen goods.

[Sur...prise? Your new friend here is actually a criminal. Good going, Mabel, you sure can pick them.]

Super High School Level Yakuza? What's that mean?

[She has a feeling it's something criminal, if that can means he's not easily conned and also he wouldn't get arrested for something "as lame as" that, but she's not 100% sure. First of all what the heck is a Super High School Level? Does he go to like...some kind of high school for super heroes or something? Is that what it means?

What's a Yakuza too?]

Where I'm from, there's a high school called Hope's Peak. The only way in is to be scouted by the school itself. And they only scout you if you're in high school and you're the very best at whatever it is you do, whatever your talent is. Everyone who's accepted gets a title according to their talent, Super High School Level Yakuza, Super High School Level Gymnast, Princess, Photographer, you get the idea. Those who graduate go on to become the movers and shakers in the world, you're basically set for life.

[Or, you know, IDEALLY, you would. But Despair World was a thing. So...not so much anymore.]

That's so cool!!! I want a school like that! I'd totally get scouted!!

[She's HYPE about this idea. She would definitely get a title, because she's the very best at so many things?]

What's your title mean? What's "Yakuza"? Also there's a Super High School Level Princess? She's the very best princess? Did you ever meet her?

Heh, yeah, it's pretty cool I guess.

[Super High School Level Arts & Crafts, Mabel Pines.]

A yakuza's... [He gives a defeated sort of sigh. As much as Fuyuhiko hates calling it "the Japanese Mafia" he's come to find that that's probably the easiest way of explaining it to foreigners. Fuck you guys for not knowing what it is though, for real.] do you know what the mafia is? We're kinda like the Japanese Mafia. Similar concept, at least. I'm the heir to the Kuzuryuu clan, the largest syndicate in Japan. When my old man steps down or kicks it, I'll take over his position as boss.

[laughtrack.wmv]

All three of those titles I listed belong to people in my class, but one of 'em's not here right now. Sonia is though, she's princess of a country called Novoselic and an exchange student. She just got here with this latest group.

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WELCOME TO YOUR PRIVATE CHANNEL, NINEHEADED. FOR SECURE COMMUNICATION, USE 009.21.328.89 * NineHeaded has joined 009.21.328.89 <NineHeaded> this is kuzuryuu fuyuhiko. <NineHeaded> you're probbaly better off coming to find me than leaving a message on this piece ofshit. <NineHeaded>** but whatever. if it's not stupid,i'll get back to you whenever i open my laptop again.