Private Channel

[impheired]

WELCOME TO YOUR PRIVATE CHANNEL, NINEHEADED. FOR SECURE COMMUNICATION, USE 009.21.328.89 *** NineHeaded has joined 009.21.328.89 <NineHeaded> this is kuzuryuu fuyuhiko. <NineHeaded> you're probbaly better off coming to find me than leaving a message on this piece ofshit. <NineHeaded> but whatever. if it's not stupid,i'll get back to you whenever i open my laptop again.

Comments

[titularly]

it's osomatsu! i found your thing by entering random numbers!

[impheired]

[Oh goddammit.]

well that answers both my questions. don't ever send me anything like this again, got it?
seriously, even you can't be stupid enough to believe this, right?

[titularly]

well duh

i was the one who made it up.. pretty genius, right? i already got karamatsu and jyushimatsu sending it to a bunch of people!

WHAT THE HELL IS THAT ICON

[impheired]

genius is not the word i would use. you're THAT bored?

THE BEST ICON

[titularly]

pretty much, yeah

half of my brothers are never home because of work and the other half never wanna hang out with niisan! i gotta do something fun or ill die! ill seriously die!!

jfc

[impheired]

so i'm guessing that means YOU still haven't gotten a job then, huh?

November 3rd; Action

[hamham]

[So it's before sending this chainletter to Hiyoko that Gundam realized something. While he is pretty sure this is serious, and he definitely doesn't want to suffer being a snake forever, is it worth it to send something like this to something like her...that's when he decides to talk to the most knowledgeable guy he knows.

Laptop in hand, he (somewhat clumsily) starts slithering towards their room, hoping that Fuyuhiko would be there and he wouldn't have to try and hunt him down when he's still getting the hang of his new snake body. Thankfully it's not that far of a trek from the kitchen, where he'd been browsing the network and enjoying a little snack.]

Kyoudai?

[Just peeking into their room. Are you here brother?]

[impheired]

[Luckily for Gundam, Fuyuhiko is in their room. He's laying on his futon, idly rolling a tennis ball back and forth between his claws. His own laptop is sitting atop the dresser, still open to his private channel.]

[He looks up when Gundam enters the room, catching the ball under one of his newly-scaled hands.]

What's up, kyoudai?

[hamham]

[Oh thank god.

He quickly moves to join him, half of his tail still trailing outside the door and probably still even a little down the stairs but he's got most of himself on his own futon at least.

He looks very distressed.]

I desperately require your guidance. I've recently received a cursed message and yearn to avoid the ill effects of such a hex, but am hesitant to follow its instructions as perfectly as I should. Namely I do not wish to deal with Saionji regarding this matter...seeing as you are more knowledgable of such mortal spells and traditions, I was hoping you would be able to help...

[impheired]

......

[Are you fucking kidding him.]

Was it about a kid who died on a porch because he got shitty candy?

[The look on his face alone should probably be enough to tell Gundam that he was right not to send this message to Hiyoko.]

[hamham]

[At the question he nods, holding his laptop a little closer to himself. The look does indeed say it was a good idea not to send it to Hiyoko. But he still looks very invested in learning how to break this curse.]

It was, yes. Does it require that I send it to people who I am somewhat close with or would it be possible to avoid sending it to her...would I still break the curse otherwise, if it were sent to some that I am only mere acquaintances with instead? In that same vein, I would like to avoid placing such a curse upon you, or Sonia...

[Help him. Save him.]

[impheired]

[Fuyuhiko sighs.]

...kyoudai. [His tone is as disbelieving as his expression.] It's not a curse. It's a chain letter sent by a stupid asshole who's got nothing better to do with his time. It's not real, all sending it will do is make you look like an idiot.

1/2

[hamham]

[........................sweats.]

[hamham]

I-I see.

[Well then. Who did he send it to...Karamatsu probably won't think too poorly of him...Mahiru though.............fuck.]

I have a follow up question.

[impheired]

[Oh my god, Gundam...]

[Fuyuhiko goes back to rolling his ball between his hands, though he's still paying attention to Gundam. He's clearly just a little bored and trying to do something to keep his hands occupied.]

And that is...?

[hamham]

[Gundam pulls his tail into the room, doing his best to fill up a corner of it so as not to intrude any on Fuyuhiko, and uses the end of it to close the door as quietly as possible.]

You would not, by chance, be willing to send Koizumi elsewhere if she comes looking for me would you...?

[impheired]

...did you send it to her?

[hamham]

[The way he ducks his head a little is probably answer enough.]

I did...

[impheired]

[It is.]

Well, I doubt she'll come after you over something like that. She'll probably just message you back. But...if she does, I won't let her know where you are.

[Not saying he'll send her elsewhere though, he's not stupid enough to purposefully lie to Mahiru. Not over something like this.]

[titularly]

im still looking!!!!

it just
hasnt been going well is all

i just thought i could mess around in between job searching, y'know?
have a little fun before i get tied down for life to a boring, no-fun job

[impheired]

uh huh.
so, you've been hardly looking instead of looking hard, am I right?

and you know, you'll still have time in between work for having fun.
it's not like once you get a job you suddenly lose all your free time, dumbass.

[titularly]

but arent jobs like tiring and stuff?
like you work all day and get home and eat and then go to bed

and then you have to get up the next day to re-do the same shit over and over again

[impheired]

depends on the job. how often you work, how long you work on a given day, what exactly you do, shit like that.

and if you can land a job doing something you like, it's not tiring at all.

[titularly]

do you think id be able to get a job i liked?

liiiiiiike a card dealer or a bartender or something at a stripclub or something?

[do you have any faith in his ability to land anything at all......]

[impheired]

what the fuck would you even do at a strip club?

[Disgusting. Doubly disgusting if Osomatsu intended to BE the stripper in that example. Though Fuyuhiko is pretty sure that's not what the man had in mind.]

[Dear god, please don't let that be what he had in mind.]

pretty sure you need training to be a bartender. so that's probably a no-go for you unless you want to actually go through with something like that.
card dealer you could probably manage though.